yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
