It's like God shit irony all over that family
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
