Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
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Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
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He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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