I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Randomize
