Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Randomize
