What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize