just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
