I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize