Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
