I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
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