I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
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Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
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There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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