Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."