I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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