He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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