We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize