you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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