Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize