that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
lets start a swedish sibling band together
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
