Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
