She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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