have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
