I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize