OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
