How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
