doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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