then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
well you can't waste a boner
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
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I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
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Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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