I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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