If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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