Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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