too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
