i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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