Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
