do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
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What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
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NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.