i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
