ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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