help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You pole danced in your parka.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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