hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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