I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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