i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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