Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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