Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
