he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
