Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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