I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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