No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
