4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
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oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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