You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
