Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
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Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.