if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
