OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
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Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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