we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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