Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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